Ever woke up one morning and said toy yourself " I don’t even like my job!"

Well, you got to do what you got to do. To bring food to the table , feed the kids , make the wife happy. What the fuc* am I saying? I don’t even have a family. I guess it one of these things you just waking up to get rid of , like waking up for piss in the middle of the night. And if your job is like mine , its like trying to piss through a hard-on. Well , to tell the trough I go to my work for the coffee.

You probably heard that teaching is an every day adventure. You see,  that proves the relativity theory. Being with 35 people half your age , you hate them , they hate you. You don’t want to teach and they don’t want to learn. It is an adventure to some. for me its just work.

You know what would make teaching more interesting; Guns. I am absolutely against gun control movements specially when the case is a gun in the classroom . You always see it in Mexican standoffs. Someone proves a point , all mistakes have been realized , there's no need to revise nor go through anything one more time and whoever survives it would get a good lesson. I think that would assist both teachers and students in the educational process.

Why am I talking about teaching ?

I don’t even like my job! It pays good though, bring food to the table , feed the kids , make the wife happy.

Hi,

its too early in the morning and I didn't have my morning joe. I'm grumpy , so this might be a little harsh for you guys , boohoo.

A person from the UK IMed me (that's sent me an instant message online, please do I have to explain everything). well, this person was complaining that i was so critical on my last post about the UK.

I'm really sorry, I really don't know how the protocol on this thing works. you get to make jokes on Saudi people , stereotype them as you like and imagine things that are not there (despite the fact that none of those critiques never been to Saudi Arabia). on the other hand , the critique protocol states that you cannot, at any level and by any chance ,  criticize the UK.

Well I'm sorry for being a Goddamn nonconformist unorthodox heretic. I renounce the protocol

.

Threw out the ages (mostly very very recent ages actually) the English have contributed to the development of knowledge. You have pushed the wheel of human development. However, you have a tendency of being judgmental. You tend to label entire nations ( hell! I do that , its really fun) . But you should really try to look in the mirror every once in a while.

Now , I would really accept it if a Japanese, a German, and person from some ( I say some ) parts of the US , would label us as backwards. Despite the fact that Japanese have a communication problem , Germans are cocky bastards and Americans don’t have any clue on other nations ; they have a right for being in the lead (somewhat in the lead). But when an English person criticize my traditions and the way I live, assumes some social fact and sympathies with someone he never really made contact with , it really gets on my nerves.

Bottom line, we are not better , we are not equal , we are just different.

1.      Attitude

You probably heard a lot about Saudis and I would say a lot of it is true. However , being unfriendly with strangers is not one of them. Seriously, being hostile with strangers is an English trend. That’s why I like Asia. Note: this rule doesn’t apply to opposite sex , sexy ones that is.

2.      Metal currency

When I first sow the UK pound , I went what the fuc*.. honestly , I shit you not. It was a shock to me. It was the biggest coin I've ever seen. You don’t need to chain a brick to a body to sink it in the river you just need exactly 2 pounds and 23 p's . And you should see the look on my face when they told me there's no paper substitute for that.

Hey I got an idea, why don’t we get little leather baggies and put our change in it and play Pirates of the Caribbean . it would really look cool to carry a little bag of money around. And you stop at a bar ( or pub as they call it ) " ohoooy matie , a beer and lass harr harr haarrr "  

Seriously, we know how much you English people like your traditions. And you hate to change anything; but for God sake lose the metal currency it’s a burden.

3.      Food

Ok , I got to tell you. I didn’t say this , I've heard it from English people over and over again. The number one dish in the country is curry (Indian curry) which is good if you don’t mind the gas. I don’t mind the gas. its my defense mechanism.

Just stop by any food stand and ask for chips. Lord ! the chips there are bigger than the potato it self. I mean its really nasty to call them chips. They're potato lumps. Back there its people that make the chips fat over that side of the world.

4.      Keys

Don’t get me started on the keys. When the host-family father handed me the keys , I really had a hard time holding it in. I don’t know what they call them , its these kinds of keys you see in an old pinkpanther cartoon. Yah pretty old. I believe they call them the mortice lock ( its hard to find a name for these , I call them pinkpanther keys)  

Come on guys , they're easy to pick , hard to carry around  and too blunt to clean your ear with.

I', not asking for finger print or eye sensor keys , just Yale. God! It been more than 20 years since I've seen one. Repeat after me , its ok to let go , its ok to let go.

5.      Old stuff

Taxies, busses, houses.. and the list goes on. The UK is a live museum.

6.      Left Side Driving

I'm not saying the Germans invented the first car. And they do left. I'm not saying that most of the world countries drive on the left. And I'm not saying that most of the countries that drove on the other side used to be English colonies. I'm not saying that.

I'm only saying that I HATE IT AND IT WRONG , WORNG I TELL YOU! WORNG! ..

 Red means Good , Blue means Bad.

7.      Rubbish Day

 Rubbish is garbage or trash in case you did not know. I think it a really Demeaning

word even for garbage.

Anyway regarding the origin of the two words the word rubbish of an unknown origin. It means some guy decided to look down at his garbage and came u pwith this word. Nose up , closed eyes, and a lot of stress on the word " Rubbbisshhhh ".  

By the way. Everyday is rubbish day here , you cant leave garbage more than on day. Helloooo , the smell …

garbage

1422, originally "giblets of a fowl, waste parts of an animal," later confused with garble in its sense of "siftings, refuse." Many M.E. cookery terms came from Anglo-Fr., so perhaps it is related to O.Fr. jarbage "a bundle of sheaves, entrails," from P.Gmc. *garba-, from PIE *ghrebh- "a handful, a grasp." Sense of "refuse" is first attested 1583. Garbology "study of waste as a social science" is from 1976.

rubbish

c.1400, from Anglo-Fr. rubouses (1392), of unknown origin. Apparently somehow related to rubble. The verb sense of "disparage, criticize harshly" is first attested 1953 in Australian and New Zealand slang.

8.      Too much wood in houses:

The only wood in my house is my morning wood , and currently its not of use to anyone.

Actually , I hate squeaky sounds specially when you're trying to take dump in the middle of the night. You don’t want to wake everybody up. I'm used to 20 cm of concrete between floors and thick layer of marble  on top of that. Wood is meant to be

In pants.

Its ok to use wood , as long as there no squeaking.

9.      Saluting

The attitude again. You're walking on the sidewalk , you pass , do your self a favor , DO NOT SAY "HI" I REPEAT DO NOT SAY "HI" . He'll shoot you with a look of disgust or fear or some kind of constipated feeling he's not able to put in words.

Sorry , I'm used to Saluting strangers back home. Its considered a sign of good-will and humanity. Rrriiight , we're not completely human.  

10.  Double taps (faucets):

You go to wash your face, you find two separate taps , one for cold and one for hot. To rationalize this , English people would say , you plug the cork in, fill the sink and wash your face. Niiiiice , then how do you explain these in public toilets. Yah put the cork in oooh wait there's spit in the sink..

Two words for you " mixer taps " or as we call them TAPS .

 Change is good , its not bad , its not too late to catch up.

I swear to God, if it was up to the English , we'd be still using the square wheels.